Expectations but zero encouragement

When someone projects huge expectations onto you but doesn’t give any encouragement to you, it can be very discouraging. It’s as if you should be able to achieve anything and everything with zero help. Just on your own. But every successful person had someone who supported them. And if they had very few or none, they atleast distanced themselves from those people who would only put expectations on them. Expectations doesn’t get you very far. As a standard we already have so many expectations being put on us that new ones do nothing. They can even completely destroy a person and their desires/passions.

So don’t put expectations on people but be encouraging instead. Tell someone they are capable. Don’t doubt them, they probably already doubt themselves a shitton already. It leads nowhere. When you doubt someone, it just means you think that if you were in that other persons shoes you believe you yourself couldn’t achieve what that other person is setting out to achieve. Let others dream big. If you’ve given up on your big dreams, stop being a Negative Nancy or Debbie Downer, be Positive Pete instead (sexism not intented, those just happen to be the names of imagary persons we’ve invented) and don’t bring others down. What good does it do? People already have enough fears, insecurities that they don’t need new ones.

Change your thoughts to change your reality

What you think about and tell yourself becomes your reality. If you are telling yourself daily that you are not good enough, you are fat, ugly etc. then you will only want to hear that from people. You will only look for evidence for that. It’s actually funny how it works. If you instead start telling yourself that you are good enough, you are awesome, funny etc. then you will see evidence for that. Paranoia is being fearful of very unlikely things, on the other hand pronoia is the phenomena that universe is conspiring to help you with everything you want to do. So become the master of your thoughts. At start you might not be able to control which kind of thoughts you get but you can choose to not give them any power and eventually they will stop appearing. Treat your thoughts like you would treat a garden. Take off the weeds and let the most beautiful flowers bloom. Your inner world is your outer world. If you change the way you see things, the things you see change. Your reality is where you look at. So look at all the positive aspects of life. You most likely have a roof over your head, food to eat everyday, running water and other privileges. Be thankful. Some people don’t have any of those things and for them it’s not certain whether they will see tomorrow or not. You are so lucky if you think about it. You don’t have to worry about a thing. Worrying is useless, it serves no purpose. It doesn’t serve you. When you worry, you get anxious and things become harder to accomplish. You procrastinate. You don’t even try. And if you never try, you can’t win. Master has failed more times than a student has even tried. So become mindful of your thoughts. Realise that they are just thoughts. They are probably what you got told to you when you were a child and now it has became your reality. Start to delete those programs from your head and replace them with new ones.

Narcissism

Hello. Been a while. I’ve not written anything in this blog for a while and I’m sorry. In actuality I’m not sorry. I’ve not had the best mood lately and I haven’t really felt productive and I’m not claiming the fact that I’m currently in the army is the sole reason for it but it definitely has an at least slightly negative effect on me. I would be lying if I said I’m not depressed after coming from the exchange back to regular life, although it’s up to me to make my life more interesting and seek for new adventures. I never thought I’d abandon writing completely because I see so many benefits in it but sometimes the time just isn’t right (or left in my case because I’m left handed, right?). I’m getting a little sidetracked and I should go to the topic which is narcissism which is something I’ve had to deal almost for my whole life in some way or another. I’ll get to what I mean by this a little bit later.

New meditation and writing challenge

It’s time again. What is time anyway. Manmade concept, illusion. Listening to Imagine Dragon’s – It’s Time right now, how fitting. I’ve been having a break from regular meditation and writing but I feel like now I need to pick them up again. Meditation was what started it all for me. Before I started to meditate about 9 months ago, I was doubting myself, I was not eating well, I wasn’t exercising enough, I was more shy, I had never asked a girl out, I wasn’t living. I probably wouldn’t be in exchange right now if I didn’t start to meditate last summer. It truely changed my life. And now I’ll stop coming up with excuses for not doing it regularly. If I don’t set myself a challenge to do it, I just find myself forgetting to do it or just saying that I’ll do it tomorrow. Tomorrow doesn’t exist, there’s just the present moment. If you want to get something done, do it now. Stop waiting, Buddha said you only think you have time. Listening to a playlist named Motivation that I made for myself and every song in it is uplifting and motivating. Clock is almost 4pm and I’m yet to get out of my bed today but I don’t even care. It’s fine. Yesterday I met one of the greatest guys I’ve met in my life. Every word he said was the pure truth. Me and him were thinking exactly the same way about things. We talked about things that are not discussed regularly because they are so controversial. Things like the moon landing, 9/11, the state of world economy and how evil it is, legalizing weed, problems of alcohol, harder drugs, about auras, love, hate, fake people, the fact that there shouldn’t be borders in the world. Also about meditation, tattoos, elements (he taught me thumb stands for fire, index finger for wind, middle finger for holy spirit, ring finger for earth and pinkie for water and it all makes so much sense). I had a great night talking and spending time with him. He was swearing to me that he knew me from before, that he knew a guy just like me. I felt the same, one of my childhood friends was and is still just like him. Some people you just feel that you have met before with even though you just met them.

Too many challenges

Lately I’ve been challenging myself alot. A bit too much. Today ends my 1h meditation challenge. I have also couple other challenges going on for me. Sober january. I must write 1000 words everyday. 5 times to the gym every week. Also I want to practice singing, yoga, playing guitar, play poker at some points and I’m playing floorball 4 times a week and volleyball 2 times a week. And I want to cycle everywhere and not use my car. And not eat any sweets of any sorts. What am I even doing. Why I’m making my life so hard for myself. I need to not restrict myself from everything and loosen up a little bit. I’ve stressed alot lately. I feel like I have so much to do but I can’t get anything done. From this point on I’ll meditate when I feel like it. I might start a new challenge when the time is right but I want to try to not make it too strict for myself with the rules of how I should live my life. I won’t go to gym if I don’t feel like it. Who says I must go there 5 times a week. I already do so much exercising already and too much exercising is a problem too. I’ve had sleeping issues,  memory problems and not the best appetite and also some personal problems. I’ve lately regularly woken up very early very alert and it’s hard to catch sleep again and then when I wake up again after catching sleep after a while, I feel very sleepy and can’t get much done in the mornings. Some days are different. Usually when I see people it’s fun but I’ve not been myself lately and sometimes I can’t think of anything to say when I feel like I would in the past in same kind of situations. Also I’m leaving for exchange in about 3 weeks and there’s alot of stuff that I’ve had to organize concerning it and still some left to do. Also I don’t know if I’ll go to army right after I come from exchange. On the other hand I’m up for it but on the other hand I’ve concidered skipping it to the future. But I think I’ll just go through with it. It’s just 2 months of duty that I have left, unless they figure out some way to make it longer for me.